A Father

The record shows how essential men are to children and to society in general. The largest predictive factor in whether a child will graduate from high school, attend college, avoid crime, reject drugs, or become an unwed parent before eighteen is the presence of a father in the child’s life. According to a recent Health and Human Services report, “Fathers play a unique role in fostering the well-being of their children, not only through providership, protection and guidance, but also through the way that they nurture the next generation.” However there is a huge catch: A father’s involvement with his children… is powerfully contingent on the mother’s attitude towards him. Research on children consistently indicates that the father-child relationship depends more on the quality of the parents’ relationship than does the mother-child relationship. Therefore as parents, it is imperative for us to keep working on our relationships and always strive to improve its quality.

Boys and girls who are exposed to the nurture of a father, and to see a father being nurturing to their mother and other adults, are much less likely to associate masculinity with predatory sexual behaviour and hyper-aggressiveness. Fathers help their children especially their daughters- develop the self-control and the sense of self-worth that protects them from premature sexual intercourse and teenage pregnancy. One study of seventh graders found that boys who had close relationships with their fathers were more likely to control their feelings and impulses, to obey rules at school and home, and to make good moral judgments. Children raised by engaged fathers are more comfortable exploring the world around them.

It is not easy to be the head of the household or simply to be a man these days, is it? It seems that wherever we turn, the role of a man as leader of his family is being questioned and undermined by the media, by feminists and by a society which sees men as disposable. However, it has not always been so. Throughout human history, fathers have served as the leaders of their clans, in their homes, they were the final arbiters on issues of substance. Only in recent decades has that position been challenged. Today, the controversy over masculine leadership at home or in the society has caused considerable confusion in the mind of many fathers. Fortunately, God has given us biblical truths to clear away the fog.

Despite what may seem like a dearth of heroes in our world today, outstanding men of character still exist in enormous numbers. The title of ‘hero’ is not defined only by bravery and life-giving sacrifice. However most fathers give their lives in a more subtle way, through the many choices they make for the benefit of their families. Though these dads are rarely recognised for their dedication and sacrifice, their steady commitment to traditional faith and values in the foundation of every new generation. Every one of them deserves the title “good family man,” and most of them could be considered heroes.

Finally, you may be a father and be thinking that you are not characterized by those nice, heroic virtues mentioned above or you may be a son and be thinking: I never had a father like that, or you may be a single mom and be wondering how your child (ren) will ever amount to anything without the presence of an engaged father. Good news is that we have a strong, kind and engaged father in heaven. A father wise enough to guide us in the way, generous to provide for our needs, and offering to walk with us every step of the way. Your father may have let you down or your husband left home or maybe he’s even there but not engaged or perhaps you as a man do not consider yourself to be the epitome of a good family man. God is able to teach you how to be a good family man if you will surrender your will to him, able to make up for the years when you lacked fatherly love and as he is the father to the fatherless, he is able to lead, teach and help your children in ways that earthly fathers can only aspire to. Make it a must to pray for a father, brother or husband today and let us see God radically bless and transform our men.

Reference, A Father, A Hero by Dr. James Dobson